TALKING ABOUT SEX
Talking about sex
First off, quality sex, the one both partners appreciate, is one convened by the both of you, set between certain limitations. How else can you get to such an understanding if not by communication? You need to talk to your girlfriend, wife or lover, about what you must avoid doing, what she wouldn’t like happening, and so on.
If you’re not a virgin, which I assume you’re not, then you have no issue starting a conversation about sex with your partner, no matter how detailed. After all, this wouldn’t be the first time you’re riding that horse, so I guess everything is a go. But still, even if you do have many good fucks under your belt, it doesn’t mean you put enough importance on communication.
Especially for a woman, this matters a lot, seeing that you are open and flexible, that you want the sex to get better, and that you care about her satisfaction as well. Granted, maybe you’ll hit the jackpot from the first try and give her the best sex she’s ever had in ages, but the odds of that happening are slim.
Most probably, you won’t be able to satisfy her completely, and this is an issue that should be solved. If you figure out what’s wrong, then fix it. If you have no idea though, the only real solution is talking about it.
However, men are slightly less talkative than women when it comes to sex. But you should still be available for any confusion or questions she might have. Especially if she’s inexperienced. There are many things she can only find out from you, her partner.
I’m not talking about the awkward conversations when you ask if it was good, if she felt good or stuff like that. These questions are the mark of a virgin, when you have no idea what you’re doing, or if you’re even doing it correctly.
As for the rest, communication and sexual conversation have a much more important role, which is maintaining an understanding between partners. Moreover, new subjects and sexual techniques can only be brought to the table through talking.
Perhaps the partners discovers something new she wants to try, or she figures out what she’s been doing wrong, but if she can’t talk to you, then it’s all pointless.
Don’t be an antisocial sex-craved piss-pot who only wants to fuck, because things won’t work out well for you. Think about what she likes, or what you’d both like, and just talk about it. Your balls won’t fall on the floor, and your self-esteem won’t be lower if you talk about sex.
As far as I can see, these are the most important situations when you should want to talk about your sex life. It’s not only an advantage, but also a necessity.
When you know she’s inexperienced
In this case, you really have no choice other than being calm, tempered, and willing to slowly take it all in. No, I’m not talking about the dick, you filthy fuck. I’m talking about letting her accommodate to the experience. If she has a basic understanding of sex and intercourse, she’ll quickly figure it out, so you don’t actually need to guide her all the way. It’s not exactly rocket science…
Still, when it’s her first time doing it, there will be uncertainties, confusions, questions, and surprises that you have to take care off. You could only answer her questions through action, but I don’t see why you’d dodge a conversation.
Being capable of talking about sex without awkwardly smiling or laughing naively is a show of maturity. Being immature and lacking in seriousness will only make her repress her questions and curiosities, and this will lead to disaster.
You don’t want a disaster on your head, do you? I thought so. So don’t act like a 15-year old kid who’s just heard about pussies and cocks.
When you want to spice things up
This is yet another example when communications is essential. If you know your partner well, her preferences, dos and don’ts, then you might want to make her a surprise. But let’s assume you don’t know all this. And that you don’t want to freak her out.
If you want to try a new position that you’ve heard is godlike, it would be best to first talk it out with your partner. Maybe, for whatever reasons, she doesn’t share your enthusiasm. Either she doesn’t like it, or she finds it strange and unappealing, or she’s afraid of what could happen.
You need to be aware of these things. On the other hand, imagine that you’ve always wanted to try something, but you’ve been afraid of sharing it. When you finally do, she’s overly ecstatic and enthusiastic, obviously wanting to do it as well. The fucking irony…
Now you see what sexual conversation is good for? It rids you of many problems, brings a lot of opportunities, and it makes your sexual life much more satisfying.
When she’s unsatisfied and you don’t know why
If you can’t figure out what the exact problem is, and what you’re doing wrong, it’s high time you spoke to her. Talking about your own failings and mistakes, if there are any, only goes to show how mature you are, something she’s clearly appreciate.
But maybe she’s upset because she doesn’t have any feedback from you, whether she’s doing it good or not. Don’t just watch all this unfold, her uncertainties, and don’t let confusion gnaw at her. I guarantee you won’t be quite satisfied and happy seeing her gloomy all the time.
Like I said, communication is essential when it comes to sex, whether you want to support and encourage her, trying something new and enlivening the sexual life, or if a problem appears. All of these things require communication, and you should definitely not avoid talking it out.
Don’t limit yourself, and don’t limit your sexual potential by avoiding sexual conversations. They can only make things better.
